Dealing with Heartbreak


Ezekiel 24:17 “Forbear to cry, make no mourning for the dead, bind the tire of thine head upon thee, and put on thy shoes upon thy feet, and cover not thy lips, and eat not the bread of men.”

Ezekiel was a man of God who was being used by God, and yet God told him that his wife was going to die of a stroke that night. The heartbreak that Ezekiel felt must have been great. The one encouragement that he had every night when he came home from preaching to the rebellious people was his wife. Now, his wife was going to be taken from him. That night was probably one of the longest nights of Ezekiel’s life, and yet God cared for him by showing him how to deal with heartbreak. Let me point out the several things that God counseled Ezekiel about dealing with heartbreak.

First, grief is a part of life, and it is real. To those who have yet to lose someone close to you, don't be judgmental of those who are grieving over someone they have lost; your day will come. Everyone has to deal with grief, and often that grief comes from the death of a loved one. Now, everyone deals with grief differently, but the fact that everyone has grief is real. Not only is grief real, but it is a part of life. God does not hate you because someone close to you has been taken away by death. You are not the first one to lose a loved one. Grief happens to all, and it is always unfortunate whenever it happens, but it is a part of life.

Second, there is nothing wrong with crying. When Jesus came to Lazarus’ grave, the Scriptures tell us that He wept. Weeping is a part of grieving that helps you to overcome the hurt of the grief. Many people hurt themselves in their grieving process because they say they need to be strong for everyone else. My friend, the greatest strength is often found in tears. There is nothing wrong with crying when you are hurting or grieving with someone else; it simply shows that you are human and that you are going through the process of healing from heartbreak.

Third, the grief must stop at some point. God told Ezekiel to “forbear” from crying because He was teaching him that there comes a point when you must stop grieving. One of the guidelines God gives us in the Scriptures about grieving is when Moses died. God allowed Israel to grieve the loss of Moses for thirty days and then He told them to move on. Thirty days is a good grieving point, but you must move on. This doesn't mean that you are going to stop hurting; it simply means that you have chosen not to let grief become bitterness.

Fourth, the way to move on from heartbreak is to do what you always do; don’t stop. God told Ezekiel to “bind the tire of thine head upon thee, and put on thy shoes upon thy feet,”. God is teaching that doing what you always do is a great healer of heartbreak. Many stop what they normally do and hurt the healing process of heartbreak. When heartbreak comes, don't miss church, your walk with God, or your daily duties; keep doing what you always do because your daily routines are your out to relieve you from the pressures of heartbreak.

Fifth, go help someone else. God told Ezekiel to go speak to the people in the morning. By helping others, you will find a way to use your heartbreak, which will make the heartbreak less hurtful. It will still hurt, but it becomes a tool to help others and overcome the grief of heartbreak by helping those who are going through what you have faced.

Dr. Allen Domelle

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