Dealing with Hurt


1 Samuel 16:1 “And the LORD said unto Samuel, How long wilt thou mourn for Saul, seeing I have rejected him from reigning over Israel? fill thine horn with oil, and go, I will send thee to Jesse the Bethlehemite: for I have provided me a king among his sons.”

God asked Samuel, “How long wilt thou mourn for Saul…?” The reason Samuel mourned for such a long time is because of the investment he made in Saul. It is easy to understand why he mourned because he had invested time, heart, and hopes that Saul would be a great leader for Israel. As some would say, Samuel was smarting because of Saul’s disappointment. God had rejected Saul because of his hard and rebellious heart. However, God wanted Samuel to move on. There was someone else he could help, and if he didn't move on, he would not be able to help that other person. Had Samuel not moved on, he would not have been able to invest in David, the greatest king Israel would ever have.

Many ministry leaders can identify with Samuel in the verse above; however, you must move on like he did if you want to help others. Someone comes to you and tells you that they want to leave, and they expect you to take it as if it is nothing. The one moving on wonders why you are so hurt, but the fact that you are hurt should reveal to them that you love them; that is why you respond in somewhat of a sharp manner. However, you must move on from the hurt, and God shows us how in the verse above.

First, stop dwelling on the hurt. God was telling Samuel, “Move on!” Dwelling on the hurt of what someone has done by leaving or hurting you will not make the hurt any better. You have to move on from the hurt if God is going to use you. As long as you dwell on the hurt of another, you are missing your opportunity to invest in another person.

Second, realize that you are not the only one hurting. Let me ask you a question, have you considered that God is also hurting? God is hurting as much as you are, but He has moved on. Sure, what someone has done hurt you, but you must move on because there are multitudes of people who you can help if you don't dwell in self-pity.

Third, get up and go soul winning. God told Samuel to “go.” Soul winning is one of the greatest ways to dig yourself out of self-pity. Soul winning gets your eyes off you and puts them on others, which is the key to moving on. Pastor, the next time someone hurts you by telling you that they are leaving, grab some tracts and go soul winning. Sunday school teacher or ministry leader, go soul winning the next time someone tells you that they want to leave your leadership to be under someone else. Going soul winning is an active decision which forces you to flee self-pity to having compassion for someone else.

Fourth, be filled with the Holy Ghost. God told Samuel to “fill thine horn with oil.” Spend time getting God’s anointing on you through prayer. Prayer is the place where you can spill your heart of hurt out to God so that He can fill that void where the hurt was with His power.

Fifth, invest yourself in someone else. There is another David that you can invest in if you will choose to invest in others when you are hurt. Don't let your hurt cause you to miss that next person to invest in. Get up and go invest in others; the greatest investment of your life could be found if you will get up and go.

Dr. Allen Domelle

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