Stop Inserting Yourself


Luke 1:58-59 “And her neighbours and her cousins heard how the Lord had shewed great mercy upon her; and they rejoiced with her. And it came to pass, that on the eighth day they came to circumcise the child; and they called him Zacharias, after the name of his father.”

The verses above always amaze me as to how bold these relatives were to insert themselves into the lives of Zacharias and Elisabeth. These relatives thought they had the right to name the baby of Zacharias and Elisabeth when truly it was none of their business. They were inserting themselves into something that was not their area, nor was it their right to even give their opinions about what the child should be named. The child belonged to Zacharias and Elisabeth. It was Zacharias and Elisabeth’s responsibility to name the child and raise the child for the LORD. For these relatives to insert themselves into this relationship, they were essentially telling Zacharias and Elisabeth that they didn't know how to care for their child.

I find in this story the importance of every person learning to stay out of the business of others. Many relationships have been hurt because some people didn't know how to stay out of an area that was not their area. There are several areas where you must be careful about not inserting yourself or your opinions if you don't want to cause harm to relationships.

First, I believe that parents must be careful about inserting themselves into their grown children’s life. I know that parents mean well, but you can ruin your relationship with your child if you don't let them be the adult that they are. Many parents have inserted themselves into how their grandchildren are being raised, only to hurt their relationship with their children. Likewise, many parents have inserted themselves into their single child’s life thinking that they need to tell them who to marry. My friend, you need to trust that you raised your children right to make the right decision. You could potentially run your child away from you if you don't take your hands off and let them be the adult that you raise them to be.

Second, I believe that children need to stop inserting themselves into their parent’s lives. I’m amused when children think they need to tell their parents what they need to do in life. Your parents are very capable of making their own decisions, and for you to treat them as your children will only drive a wedge between you and them. Just because parents have gotten old doesn't mean they can't think for themselves. Grown children need to stay out of their elderly parent’s decisions if they want to keep a good relationship with them.

Third, I believe followers need to stop inserting themselves into leadership roles. It is not the job of the follower to tell the leader what they think they need to do. It is the job of the follower to follow. When followers are trying to tell the leaders how to lead, the follower is leaving their responsibility undone. Instead of telling the leader how to lead, you would be wise to care for your area of responsibility until you become the leader.

Fourth, I believe leaders need to stop inserting themselves into areas of the follower’s life that is not the leader’s area to lead. Leaders get so used to making decisions and judgments that often they insert themselves into the personal lives of a follower, which is not their area. Yes, leaders are there to help, but they must be very careful about not intruding into areas that are not their responsibility.

Dr. Allen Domelle

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